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froggy loves her tubby

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[02 Jan 2006|12:08am]
[ mood | cranky ]

I’m switching journals, and eventually, I’m going to delete this one. And this time, I’m choosing who gets to read it. I’m tired of my shit getting broadcasted to people who I clearly don’t want to know. I trusted you guys to keep this stuff to your self. Don’t fucking cause drama. Especially this drama. I don’t need it. So go and fuck yourself five times straight. Kay? If you really really wanna be added back, you better comment here before I fucking delete this journal. And of course the usual people are of course added. This was a great way to start off the fucking New Year. Thanks a whole fucking bunch.

8 can't stand it | haven't you heard that i'm the new cancer

MFEO. [17 Dec 2005|12:57pm]
[ mood | cranky ]

If I could, I'd remove myself from this family. I think my family would be very happy about this. I'm the root of all our problems it seems. My grandmother is blaming me for the reason water isn't going down the fucking drain in out bathtub. And she's yelling at me because I didn't tell her. When I told her so many fucking times I could name you every single day I did. Okay, maybe not ever single day, but I know I told her so many fucking times. And now she's crying, and I know it's because of me. And I'm crying too. They're tears of fucking frustration. But I can't let them see. Because I'll suddenly be selfish.

2 can't stand it | haven't you heard that i'm the new cancer

FUCK [25 Oct 2005|09:04pm]
[ mood | lonely ]

I miss my boyfriend.
I'm sorry if you don't care.
But I do.
And all I want is to be next to him right now.
Fuck. Crying time.

Leave me love.
14 can't stand it | haven't you heard that i'm the new cancer

[10 Oct 2005|05:43pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]

x_areyouhot_x
JOIN IT BITCHES.
1 can't stand it | haven't you heard that i'm the new cancer

[17 Sep 2005|11:49pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]

I talked to Ethan three times today. It was wicked cool, and it made me happy. I missed his voice so much. It made me want to be there in Kentucky with him. I miss him so. I want to hug and kiss him, but I can't because I'm not there with him. Okay, let me stop before I work myself up. It's not going to do me any good.

I love you all so much, thank you for making last week bearable. Especially Austine. <3

4 can't stand it | haven't you heard that i'm the new cancer

[13 Sep 2005|07:00pm]
[ mood | okay ]

It's been three days. That's a record for me I think. Since Ethan's grounded, I haven't much felt like writing in here. Go figures. Life has been okay, far from great. I feel really lonely, cause uhh, no one calls me, and yeah, I just feel ALONE. And it's also the fact that I miss Ethan. I miss his voice, our conversations, I really really miss the moments when he says, "I haven't said this enough, I love you." I live for that moment. I wish I could tell him I love him at least one more time. I feel like I should hit myself over the head, I feel like I didn't tell him enough on saturday. -hits head- There are so many more things I wish I had told him on Saturday. I guess it just didn't sink in that it would be practically FOEVER until I could talk to him again. It hit me about yesterday, when I realized that my phone wasn't going to ring the normal Ethan ring. :( You also know what is sad a pathetic, it's only been three days, and I've written him so many letters. I can't get him off my brain. I LOVE YOU ETHAN (even though you won't read this until like oct.).

School's been okay. I've had a few laughs here and there. I'm doing my best not to let on to how much I feel alone right now. I feel empty too. I need his voice, and I can't listen to his old phone messages because they make me miss him so much. Yesterday during 5th period, I went into the bathroom and listened to his messages. All 17 of them. Wait, 14, three are from my friend Mattty. And I cried like a new born baby. Hahaha. And you could tell that I was crying cause my eyeliner was everywhere. I was too lazy to whip it off, and I was hoping it would give me and excuse to blow everyone off. You guys, I misses him so much. I need something to get my mind off of him, though we all know it won't happen. I'm going to the mall saturday, hopefully and friday maybe a football game? I don't know if there is a home one or not. GO -J-O-P-P-A-T-W-O-N-E -H-I-G-H-.

My day yesterday was complete shit. My day was seriously made when I saw one of Aussie's To Do Lists. They remind me of old times. Hehe, that girl makes my day and I love her so much. :)

I've been drowining myself in sugar, chocolate and soda. And I feel fat.

--Maya

17 can't stand it | haven't you heard that i'm the new cancer

Silver and Cold [04 Sep 2005|02:09pm]
[ mood | content ]

Today started off kind of shitty. I wake up and first thing, I get yelled at by my grandmother. She yelled at me because I didn't help her with the dishes at like 8 this morning. Fucker, I was still sleeping. She even yelled at my mother, like she still has some fucking authority over her. I hate it here. I hate it. Someone please fucking rescue me, or at least call me. I'm like fighting against myself, because I don't want to call Ethan, I call him a lot and I think I might be annoying him a little. >.< 410.459.3827. Call it loves.

3 can't stand it | haven't you heard that i'm the new cancer

[25 Aug 2005|11:22pm]
So I've decided what I want for my birthday/christmas, I want Ethan. So uhh, make it happen. I'm counting on you.
2 can't stand it | haven't you heard that i'm the new cancer

Pearls. [25 Aug 2005|09:24am]
[ mood | happy ]

Yummmmmy. Pretty pictures of me. Sorry if I rape your friends page with my pretty face. YOU'LL DEAL.



+3Collapse )

Today is going to be so long and boring. Le sigh. My grandmother is cleaning which is never good for me. I've been polising furniture since yesterday. So I'm hiding in my room until tomorrow when she should be done.

School also starts on monday. Score. I'm ready. I've had WAY to much time on my hands and now I'll have homework. And it'll keep me busy and it'll some what keep my mind off of Ethan. Pft. Like that'll ever happen. I need to talk to my granny about the whole phone issue, because she has this stupid idea that she takes my phone after I get back from school. I'm going to try and convince her to let me have it after I finish all my homework. It'll work, cause I'm good like that. And I have a plan for school this year. I'm going to start doing some homework during lunch, because I have like 45 minuets, and doing most of the rest on the weekends. Most of my classes give use a list of all the assignments we have every week. So it makes life easy. And it thus leaves more time to do my assignments for my art classes and time to talk to Ethan. I hope. Arg. I just want it to start already.

I wonder if Ethan's got the thing I mailed him like three days ago. I wonder. I won't know until tomorrow probably cause he's grounded and can't talk on the phone tonight. -dies-
5 can't stand it | haven't you heard that i'm the new cancer

Yeah, I'm like all the rest. [11 Aug 2005|05:26pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]

Yes, I'm like the rest. I'm doing that whole "friends only" thing. Comment to be added.
11 can't stand it | haven't you heard that i'm the new cancer

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